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Handling fall

January 28, 2019

Every failure can be a launching pad for success, say several motivational quotes. But yet, we take failure in the most disempowerment manner. Swami Sukhabodhananda often says that in the teaching of Martial Arts or horse riding, the first thing that they teach you is the skill of falling down. I had a question from a girl in one of my talk sessions,” You mean we should celebrate even if we lose in our exams?”  Looked at her and said “ We don’t have to organize a party and sing and dance for having lost in our exams. But we don’t have to look at it as the end of the tunnel or as a reflection of our potentials. It is an event. Learn from it but do not take its sting” . Failures are a course correction method. Take it in the right spirit. Its nature’s method of training you towards success.Lets take a fall on the route to success. Lets take thelife of Abhraham Lincoln. At a tender age he lost in a relationship. Later he lost a job, lost an election to the legislature, wife died to a fatal disease, lost an election to the senate twice, lost in business, failed to become the speaker to the assembly, couldn’t win the election as Vice President ,until at the age of 51 , when he became the President of the United States of America. He did not take, the failure at every step of his early life as the end of the tunnel. He remained more and more refined.

Swamiji often reminds us of the decorative cup in our showcase. The cup speaks of the amount of kneading he received as a handful of mud. He was subjected to a spin, crushed and tutored. Everypart of his structure was subjected to scrutiny and shaped to excellence with sharp appliances.  He was put on the hot drier, and painted with all kinds of colors and left for seasoning. At the end of all  these trials, you have the beautiful cup that adorns the cupboard that all who visit are enthralled by its magnificence. In the same way, the failure of loosing some marks or being rejected or being humiliated are the instruments to self introspection that induces us to further refinement which will bring success. Take the example of Amitabh Bachhan. He was rejected for his voice at the interview at All India Radio at Delhi. He was once again rejected at the Mumbai studio. But all these failures fell at the right centre for Amitabh Bachhan that he took them as learning lessons and not as insurmountable obstacles.  Peaks and valleys are but a certainty in everyone’s life and unless one has the right attitude towards the fall, success is difficult to achieve.

If we look into the mechanics of Despondency and Hurt, we find that it is our Mind that causes the disorder. There is an event – maybe an event which denies or rejects or bypasses. The event is an event. By itself it has no potency to create Hurt or Despondency. The Mind through its interpretation creates a narrative of the event. This narrative is peculiar to the Human Mind. This arises out of the process of interpretation. The interpretation is again determined by the formulae that one nourishes. A young child has no formulae. No other animal creates reference points and consultants like formulae for evaluation. IT is only the adult human being after having gone through teenage that builds the processing unit with all the formulae arising out of past experiences, peer influence and beliefs. Rejection is Hurt. Failure is a loss.  Disagreement is disrespect. Teasing is upsetting. Concentration is pressure. Work is tension. These are formulae that are the references for the Mind to process an event.  Thus arise the narratives and the intensity around the event. This amplification of the event and the masala that we spin around the event depending on the state of our being is the primary cause for the outcome of despondency.

The focus thus falls on the structure of the Human Mind. When the Mind is engulfed with thoughts  and conclusions that have been downloaded and installed by the influence of past memories, peer behavior, community commandments and impacted by situations, the precipitating results can be determining factors. Garbage IN garbage OUT – GIGO principle works here too. A sense of alertness to harness a Healthy Mind that is independent of all the influences and has the freedom to reflect and pierce through the truth is what keeps the person maintain a Samatvam, a balance. The nakedness of the event is purely nature’s communication in the most simplified and de-amplified manner. Every addition, conclusion, interpretation is to be watched very carefully. This enable every person to see the Nectorin  every criticism, a silver lining in every cloud, a path in the midst of the chaos.