Go to the top

The Past is A Place of Reference Not Residence

December 16, 2017

Life can hit hard. Sometimes you get knocked down when you don’t even see it coming. Some are small shots, some are hard blows and some can bring you to your knees. When this happens, it’s not about how hard you get hit; it’s about how hard you can get hit, but still, find the strength to keep moving forward. It’s about having the will to continue in spite of the obstacles.

Dwelling on the past will make you lose sight of your present life. This can make your life quickly pass you by without enjoyment of the present. If you find yourself focusing too much on past events or trauma, there are some methods that can help you learn to live for today, they are


Give up the excuses to move forward

All the excuses and explanations in the world won’t do you any good.  They won’t add any value to your life or improve the quality of it by even the slightest margin.  To get where you wish to go in life requires more than just thinking and talking.  They need action. Action to leave the past where it belongs to – in past, and move forward with life.

You do have exactly what it takes

Always remember, no matter what people say, no matter how much they criticize you or backdrop you, always believe that You do have exactly what it takes. It hurts hard to get hit on the wounded area, so when you have a past that you might feel bothers you, people will use it for their advantage to bring you down. Don’t fall for their trap, keep working for a better future

 Give up focusing on what’s wrong, and start noticing what’s right.

When you stay stuck in regret of the life you think you should have had, you end up missing the beauty of what you actually do have.  You will have a hard time ever being happy if you aren’t thankful for the good things in your life right now.

Don’t pay attention to other people’s judgments and opinions.

Honestly, the biggest prison you will likely ever live in is your fear of what other people think.  You cannot let other people tell you who you are or what you want.  You have to decide that for yourself.  When you’re making big decisions, remember what you think of yourself and your life. It is more important than what people think of you.  Don’t let others make you feel guilty for living YOUR life.  As long as you’re not hurting anyone else, live it YOUR way.

Leave Regrets behind
Leave your mistakes and regrets in the past. They don’t define your value, then or now. When you stay in the past you become stuck and unable to move forward. We all have made mistakes with our job choices, friends and relationships. The consequences can hit us pretty hard. Give yourself the gift of forgiveness and keep moving forward.

Learn from your Failure
Learning from failure and having regret are two separate things. Regret is an emotion; a feeling of disappointment along with a modest amount of shame or guilt. But to look back at a circumstance and figure out what went wrong gives you some very important information. This review allows you to evaluate what worked and what didn’t, and more importantly, why. Often when you are removed from a situation, you can look at it more objectively which will allow you to make better choices to keep moving forward.


You cannot move forward if you are still thinking about your past. Can you imagine a track athlete attempting to compete in a 100m dash with a heavy backpack? Yes, he’s most likely going to finish the race but he won’t finish it at the appointed time that he we was supposed to. Many of us are ready to run our race, but we need to do first; we need to drop off that backpack full of shame, regrets, unhappiness, mistakes, failure, broken hearts, grudges etc. When you drop that backpack, I promise you that your race will be much easier to run in life.